Title: Nothing Lasts Forever
Author: Bj Jones
Rating: FRT
Summary: It was a beautiful goodbye…
***
Speed looked over the banquet hall, his eyes instantly landing on the bright red hair of his boss. He closed his eyes and looked away. It still hurt, even after six months apart, seeing him with someone else…
Their relationship was sudden and unexpected. In hindsight it was too fast, too much need behind it. Speed had showed up at his door after that day. The humiliation of Dispo day had sent him into his boss’s arms.
They were together for four months. Looking back it was the best four months of his life. But the fear of being found out. Fear of moving too fast. They both backed out, ending the relationship.
Speed turned back to his date and gave her a soft smile. She was nice, and in time he knew he could care deeply for her. But there were times, moments in the darkness when he thought back and wondered.
Back to that one moment. A quiet night. A walk along the beach. That perfect setting – for that beautiful goodbye.
Fed up with my destiny
And this place of no return
Think I’ll take another day
And slowly watch it burn
It doesn’t really matter how the time goes by
Cause I still remember you and I
And that beautiful goodbye
Horatio nodded to his date and gave her hand a squeeze as she left to go to the bar. He leaned back, instantly focusing on Speed. The young man was talking softly to his date, the two laughing lightly.
He thought back to six months ago, when he was the recipient of that small precious laugh. He’d had in his arms the most precious gift and had watched it walk away.
Rumors had started up about them. He had heard threats against the younger man, so Horatio had decided to put some distance between them. In the end, Speed’s own fears surfaced and the two parted.
He had taken him to a secluded section of the beach; they had talked softly, both agreeing that it was for the best, that their relationship wasn’t meant to last. It was one of the easiest breakups he had ever experienced. He had reached over and taken Speed’s mouth in one last kiss, then whispered goodbye. Speed had simply turned and walked away.
Sometimes he wondered if Speed thought of him. Of that night. If he looked up at the stars and wondered and remembered that beautiful goodbye.
In these days of no regrets
I keep mine to myself
And all the things we never said
I can say for someone else
Cause nothing lasts forever, but we always try
And I just can’t help but wonder why
We let it pass us by
“Are you coming over?”
Speed looked over at his girlfriend. “I can, if you want me to.”
“Tim,” she cupped his cheek. “You’re always welcome.”
He nodded. “There is something I have to pick up, and then I’ll come over.”
She leaned up and kissed him softly. “I’ll be waiting.” She gave him a saucy grin and stepped into the cab. Speed gave her a wave and watched the cab drive away.
He signaled for another cab. As the cab pulled up he caught a glimpse of Horatio and his date. She looked beautiful on his arm, everyone had thought so. Speed opened the door and just as he was going to slide in, he caught Horatio’s eyes. He gasped. The two were locked onto each other, their eyes not leaving the other.
***
“Horatio?”
Speed shook his head, breaking the spell. He quickly stepped into the cab and didn’t look back. His heart was pounding. The look in those deep blue eyes… Speed laid his head back; all he could think of was that night on the beach. Maybe…things weren’t as over as he thought.
When I see you now
I wonder how
I could’ve watched you walk away
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For that beautiful goodbye
“What’s wrong?”
Horatio turned towards his companion. “Nothing, go on home. I’ll talk with you later.”
“You’re not coming over?” She laid a gentle hand on his arm. “I can fix dessert.”
He shook his head. “Court in the morning and I have to prepare for it. I’ll call you tomorrow.” He gave her a quick kiss and helped her into the cab.
“Horatio…”
“Goodnight,” he smiled and closed the door.
Horatio moved to the Hummer. He got behind the wheel and sighed. He knew now that that moment, that goodbye was a mistake. He started the car up and headed home. What he didn’t know, was what he could do about it now. But then, just maybe…
***
Speed let the throttle go and let the beast out of the Ducati. He had been driving through the streets of Miami for over an hour. He wasn’t sure if he was running from his demons or towards them. All he knew was that he needed to clear his head, and so just took off on his bike, letting the wind whip through his hair.
He came to a stop at a red light. He looked around and realized he had hit his crossroads.
If he turned right, it would lead him back into town to her.
If he turned left, it would lead him to the beach to him.
He straddled the roaring bike, his heart hammering in his chest. He flicked on his blinker and made the decision.
Baby, what can I do?
To get through to you
And sometimes I cry
It’s a fool’s lullaby
Sometimes I cry
It’s just a fool’s lullaby
Horatio looked at himself in the mirror and wondered what a fool he had been to let Speed walk away. He wiped the tears from his cheeks and splashed water on his face. He had a decision to make. He could walk out this door and go to Speed’s loft or…
But what if he wasn’t home?
What if he was at her house?
What if she was there?
What if he was waiting for him?
A decision made, he grabbed his keys and opened the door, stopping short. Speed was standing on his doorstep.
Speed looked up, startled to see the door ripped open before he knocked. Horatio stared at him in shock. He had come all this way, there was no turning back. Speed pushed the redhead back into the house, closed the door and pulled him into his arms, taking his mouth in a hard, passionate kiss.
Horatio moaned at the contact, his hands instantly wrapping around the thin waist, pulling Speed close. The two kissed for what seemed like hours. Tasting and relearning each other. This is where they belonged, had always belonged.
Speed pulled back, his lips swollen, eyes filled with love. He cupped Horatio’s cheek and gave him a small smile. “Hi.”
It was the most beautiful hello Horatio had ever heard.